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 | indeed! sometimes in the midst of trying to define someone we erred on making false assumptions by just the virtue of reading what they posted or in manner their share their engaging thoughts in the chatroom.
do we have the right to make assumptions of others without having thoroughly knowing who they are? at what point do we know someone anyway? would it be enough that by conversing with someone on the chatroom - viola! we certainly know how they are or who they are and what they are.
its hard to validate assumptions specially giving in a timeframe that is to irrational and only based on gut feelings. perhaps was given at a point when somehow unknowingly you have offended someone, bruised their ego or unintentionally invaded their space or at a point wherein you are not in the best of mood. regardless there is nothing wrong with providing assumption and yet there is also nothing wrong in refuting the fallacy of assumption. would i refute assumption? i would not. the burden of truly knowing me is on them. they must on the course of their lives must know me extensively if they want me to be a part of their lives.
be as it may, some of us becomes victim of a false assumption and suddenly most become convinced because of that false assumption that you are indeed such and such without them actually knowing you in an extended period of time.
they said that i have a high regard of myself and that nakarating lang ako sa america ay kung sino na ako. everyone must have a high regard of themselves. by mostly having that, its the foundation of having a healthy life and then acquiring an excellent perspective of life. but to assume that someone only having a high regard of themselves because of where they are or have been or dahil nakarating sa america is making a mockery of one's insecurity.
none of us has the purity of values and therefore assumptions are sometimes false and never right specially given at a point that one never was closed to you or have been intimate with us.
i was not offended by the assumptions accorded on my behalf, after all eveyone has the right to make assumptions and even share it with many. but to others it could be dismaying experience to the point that to them it becomes a nightmare because they have been ill defined by virtue of that assumptions. but no one could ever define us except ourselves. and if you have a high regard of yourself, then nothing matters including false assumption. |
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pursuit of permanence!
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May 23, 2012 7:09 pm
43 Views
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pursuit of love and relationship are two different things. they are extricable and can not be totally conjure. each will stand on its own merits and purposes.
love is a much easier pursuit. it could happen anytime, to anyone even in the most unexpected moments. its emotionally or feelings' based - we felt it and then we are carried away by our emotions, and then suddenly experiencing something weirdly magical. weirdly magical because nothing matters at the moment, but the passion of loving someone.
and the distance and physical presence would not even matter to a few or to some. they would profess love in a manner by which very unconventional and hardly acceptable to many. how could such love based on LDR so profound and so passionate?
in LDR there is only love but no relationship. to relate is to be able to use at least 3 of the 5 senses. they can talk, they can write, they can hear, but they cannot smell and they cannot touch.
we when we thought or even say we love someone; no correction, if we felt we love someone, it does not guarantee that feelings is enduring. its like a dream, we wake up and then we are no longer in love. pursuit of love is fragile and easily permeable and not founded on substantial merits and even lacking in intellectual reckoning that will survive the test of time.
on the other hand, the pursuit of relationship, the preponderance when one finds the right relationship is, it will be nurturing and enduring - and in the process loves evolved in the relationship. and becomes a part of that relationship.
pursuit of a relationship is a pursuit of permanence. to relate means there is a mutual understanding, mutual love, mutual nurturing - and therefore its more profoundly enduring and lasting than the pursuit of love.
in relationship there is not only meeting of the minds but of the heart as well. in relationship one can enjoy the total package and the whole nine yards including sexuality.
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i did it!
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May 23, 2012 6:06 am
43 Views
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yes i did it. but not quite. just almost.
but just almost is good enough for now because it is a progress.
yes we can settle for just almost even in the other things we do. even in the pursuit of a good relationship. we could settle for good instead of great too!
sometimes great is too good to be true.
i got in to work just 4 minutes early instead of the usual more than 10 minutes early. but i want to come in just in time or only about 2 minutes early. i think i can still do that.
but 4 minutes is good enough for me. its almost about 2 minutes early. you never know if sometimes planning to come in time would result to coming in late of 2 minutes or more.
if we will it, it could be done. even just quite or almost.
do you have anything to will it?
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another sign of the times!
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May 22, 2012 1:51 pm
60 Views
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koko pimentel is now separated from his beauty queen wife.
he joined the ranks of many now including chiz escudero.
marital bliss perhaps is just a thing of the past for many.
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still didn't do it!
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May 22, 2012 6:08 am
62 Views
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sometimes we tell ourselves we would do something, not entirely different or even drastic. maybe just a minor change or adjustment.
no. it has nothing to do with a bucket list or even a new year's resolution. its just something that would perhaps change the dynamic of how one do a thing in a day or even in a week.
it could be just the process we are changing or perhaps our attitude to a certain thing or towards others and even to someone dear to our heart.
i told myself yesterday that i would change the way i arrive at work. its been years that i do arrive early at work, sometimes 15 minutes early but mostly 10 minutes early.
why can't i just arrive on time instead of earlier than the time i am expected to be at work? maybe its just a force of habit and it would be hard to change it.
our work schedule is from 6am to 6pm. one would either complete 8, 9 or 10 hours a day depending one's schedule. my schedule is 10 hours and therefore my work schedule is from 6am to 4:30pm. i am on a compressed schedule of 10 hours a day for 4 days.
today i failed myself, i arrived ten minutes early. maybe tomorrow i could do it. perhaps and hope so!
how about you? do you have something to change?
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holding pattern and diverted!
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May 20, 2012 8:05 pm
121 Views
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my last two trips to dallas, i was quite inconvenienced. but was never pissed off and just tolerated the inconvenienced.
last month i had a seatmate more than twice my size. she was a bit stinky too and about late 40s. initially i thought i regretted the choice i made on seating closer upfront on 6B and in the middle seat. normally i sat on an aisle or pay for setting on an aisle upfront. there was the first time in a long time i was in the middle seat.
once the plane was up in the sky, her stinky smell was vanished by the ventilation. and of course she did not invade my space as i dread she will.
last week i was on an aisle setting on 9D. it was a very comfortable and pleasant flight until when we are about to land in dallas. we were put on the holding pattern, number 8 among those planes waiting to land.
by the way i paid extra $31.00 for the 9D seat.
the holding pattern was because of the weather disruptions in dallas. there was an earlier nasty weather that created havoc in the sky that other planes have to be diverted to other airports.
we were not able to hold on to our holding pattern because we are running out of gas. we were diverted to austin, texas instead.
there was quite a confusion. one minute we were going to be refueled, the next minute we were going to disembarked and ride a bus to dallas. finally after 30 minutes in the tarmac we will refueled and told will be flying back to dallas.
the flying back did not materialize and we have to disembark. the reason we could not flew back was because the crew had max out their hours allowed to fly.
for ordinary pinoy, such situation would invite fury. but the crew were just following regulations that they could only fly certain numbers of hours daily.
i thought we will be travelling by bus to dallas. we were waiting for such decision or either we were going to stay overnight instead. after an hour, we were told that they have a replacement crew coming in about two hours.
it was kind of late when they said that announcement of a replacement crew and most every restaurants or eating joints in austin were closed. i was hungry and its getting into me. luckily one joint extended the services hours and have us served. it was best barbecue sandwich i have in texas.
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scooping my own!
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May 20, 2012 7:10 pm
143 Views
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i went to the movies by myself, and this time i limited myself to small popcorn and large diet coke. last time the large popcorn i said was quite too much. but this time, the small popcorn left me wanting.
the movie "battleship" reminded me of the years i spent at sea serving on a destroyer, a frigate, an oiler, a destroyer tender,a supply ship and several aircraft carriers.
for the first time in my movie experience i have to make my own drink out of a vending machine. no its not that type of vending machine wherein the drinks come out in a bottle or a can.
its a machine wherein you have to push for the ice and then make a selection of the drinks and then push the selection made.
i guess this new thing serving my own drinks is a sign of the times. soon i guess i have to scoop my own popcorn. its been said too that in the next 20 years, we will have smart cars who would do the driving for us. i guess robotics will have a great leap forward leaving us at their mercy, taking away the things that we normally do now.
i wonder what is left for human to do after the great leap forward of robotics? would they be able to feel for us too and choose the relationship for us. i think that too is being done for us now through the internet relationships' site.
yes professionals who are too busy with their lives or unable to lift a finger to find someone to love are resorting to such internet relationship's site or domain. of course for a hefty fee.
or maybe relationship will also be a thing of the past. all men have to do is satisfy his sexual needs by visiting a joint and then push a number and soon she will appear.
for men when visiting armsterdam, toronto, germany, thailand and other parts of the world that prostitution is tolerated - all men have to do is tell the attendant the number of the girl he likes.
how about the women? would there be equality in pushing the buttons?
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spousal support getting even!
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May 10, 2012 11:49 am
212 Views
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More women in US paying alimony to ex-husbands
May 11, 2012 12:53am
Tables have turned in US divorce courts with more women paying their former husbands alimony and child support than ever before, according to US lawyers.
As women climb higher up the career ladder and outpace their exes in salary, when love goes wrong and marriages break up they are being compelled to contribute to the livelihood of their former spouses.
And some are not happy about it.
More than half, 56 percent, of divorce lawyers across the United States have seen an increase in mothers paying child support in the last three years and 47 percent have noted a hike in the number of women paying alimony, according to the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers.
"It shows that women have really moved up financially and that in many instances they are the major bread winners in a lot of families," said Alton Abramowitz, the president-elect of the academy.
"The glass ceiling has been pierced and more and more women have taken over the financial responsibilities and have been saddled with them as well. It is a fact of the way our society has evolved over the last number of years."
Abramowitz, who has been practicing law for 39 years, described the findings of the survey and the changed role of women in the workforce as a sea change.
In his graduating law school class of 135, there were just six women. Data from the Digest of Education Statistics show that the number of men and women receiving medical degrees in the U.S. is almost equal, unlike 1980 when only about a third of medical degrees were awarded to women.
The number of women getting law degrees has nearly doubled.
"You are seeing the results of that, the impact, now in terms of the professions," Abramowitz said.
Although women have made strides professionally, the divorce rate in the United States has remained fairly constant. About half of marriages in the United Statesend in divorce. The rate has hovered between 46 and 53 percent for decades, he added.
Just as many men grumbled about paying alimony to their former wives, women are not pleased with the turnaround.
"We see women who are every bit as angry as their male counterparts, maybe more so, when they are confronted with the concept of paying spousal support to a man," said Abramowitz.
The gender switch in alimony payments is just one of many changes he has seen during his four decades as a lawyer.
"When I started practicing in 1973 there was no equitable distribution of property," he said.
The 1,600 members of the Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers handle separations, prenuptial agreements, custody battles, property evaluation and division, the rights of unmarried couples, as well as divorce and child support. - Reuters
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hold your thoughts!
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May 10, 2012 6:06 am
237 Views
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hold your thoughts is something we say to someone we are engage with in a conversation or a discussion.
it could be used in a classroom setting wherein someone raise her hand, but you acknowledge her by saying hold your thoughts because you want to continue saying your thoughts.
it could also be said when you are talking to someone on your cp while in downtown san francisco and then suddenly you see a gorgeous woman passing by and you want to really have a good look of her.
or you want to be evasive and just don't want to continue the conversation and you pretended that you have to go or must go and said the words," hold your thoughts."
i just cannot tell anyone here to hold their thoughts or hold their blogging while i am again disengaging from the net. the fff world would not be in a standstill while i am enjoying my time away from the net with my loved ones until next wednesday.
but anyway, i will be holding my thoughts for awhile. for some its a needed respite from reading of my blogs.
happy mother's day to all mothers.
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a beautiful blog!
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May 8, 2012 9:55 am
338 Views
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a beautiful blog could easily be ruined.
i was talking a blog about a one man woman.
i thought that blog has a beauty and sensibility because it invites commentaries if really a one man woman does exist.
but it was ruined by some pettiness of SHAQKOL.
again he used that blog as vehicle if not to defame others but to malign others.
i would prefer not seeing his commentaries on that blog because i want to revisit that blog and see what others would say.
now i just couldn't revisit that blog because its been contaminated by SHAQKOL.
i just thought to write this because SHAQKOL owes that blogger an apology by contaminating her blog.
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suffering easy to mend!
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May 7, 2012 5:38 pm
284 Views
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yes the weather is great. its sunny and its the middle 80's.
but why am i suffering?
yes and as like with the million others, i am one of those who suffers allergy because of the pollen - and its always at this time of the year, sometime starting early april.
but i don't ever remember suffering allergy in the philippines because of the pollen or for any other reasons, not even from food.
3 years ago, i was in baguio city during the holy week and yet not an iota of suffering from pollen i have experienced. if that's the case, then allergies from pollen is not a normal sufferings in the philippines? or i am wrong?
i was also there last year for 5 weeks from jan to late february, and yet i have not suffered any allergies.
suffering from pollen allergy includes rubbing your eyes and sneezing. sometimes it becomes worst than that. you may suffer too later with colds and coughs. i hope my sufferings won't go that far.
but this suffering is easy to mend. it will go away in due time even without taking any medications. unlike the sufferings of the heart that may linger for a long time.
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To link to this blog (absolutelyInLove) use [blog absolutelyInLove] in your messages.
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