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| Blogs > bebong2005 > MY OWN PRIVATE IDAHO |
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like a single hiccup She was my best friend. At least, that’s what she told everybody including myself. For me, we were best friends with benefits. We had friendship without limits. Only she was not aware of the benefits. Maybe because things only happens when she (and i) was intoxicated. But never sober. Afraid perhaps? Don’t want the consequences and complications it may bring? I don’t know. If she said we’re only best of friends so be it. Things were not that complicated in the beginning. She was just a neighbour and I was just there watching. I watched her spins her web, and before I know, I was caught in. Not that she’s trying. That is one thing she never did, try. It just happened. We sat with each other (if she had nothing better to do) we talked, we drank, we kissed we smoked, philosophized, and argued and tell to each other we didn’t care. She had boyfriends, I had girlfriend. But we spent Christmas, New Year, valentines and almost every minute (she could spare) with each other. If only it stayed that way. But little boys do grow up. They started to see things differently. They start wondering why she didn’t know that she was his first kiss. How could she forget things like that? It supposed to be important. He became tired of watching who will be the flavour of the night and if it didn’t worked out the way she scripted it, he had to jump in to save the day. Always on stand by, always waiting. But no recognition, Status undefined. Except the fact that she will break any relationship if the contract includes: “forbidden to see Jim.” And the knife cuts both ways. He will ditch any girl who will not allow him to play with the vampire girl. His excuse: I have known her longer than anyone except my own mother. He’s good at fooling himself. So, one night in pathetic attempt to wake her up from her years of slumber he wrote this poem: Forget the LOVE that i once showed Forget the fact that i once CARED Forget the times we spent together REMEMBER now I’m gone forever Forget i CRIED the whole night long Forget me when they played OUR SONG Forget how close we once were Remember now i have chosen ANOTHER Forget i MEMORIZED your walk Forget the way we USED to talk Forget the times when i was mad Remember I'm HAPPY and you are SAD Forget the times i called you on the phone Forget those moments that were ALONE Forget i made your DREAMS come true Remember now there's someone NEW Forget my GENTLE teasing way Forget I see you everyday Forget all the things we used to do Forget the THRILLS when i look at you Forget the way i speak your NAME Remember now things are not the same Forget the way you held my HAND Forget all those things IF you CAN Forget I said I LOVE YOU TOO Remember now its NO LONGER YOU Forget the moments that went so FAST Forget those times; they're part of the PAST Forget our DREAMS that CANNOT come true FORGET ME BECAUSE I HAVE FORGOTTEN YOU So, forget my NAME and my FACE Forget my KISSES and warm EMBRACE Forget my LOVE that ONCE was true Remember now YOU must find SOMEONE new. Only it didn’t really worked the way he pictured it was going to be. She laughed at him and said she didn’t understand. Why complicate the matters when there is no need to do so. She asked why he cannot stay the same; she thought they were doing okay, why suddenly she can’t recognize him anymore? Where is my Jim she said? So he told her that her Jim was gone. He grown up and vanished. That the reason why she cannot understand was because her brain is closed, And she never try to put herself in the position of others, that she is selfish and had Peter Pan’s Syndrome. Boy, he was courageous and foolish and there was no way back. The drugs came shortly after. From there was downhill. The only one who stayed was Rachel (his girlfriend) she, the vampire girl won’t even speak to him. The last thing she said was: “Jim, I couldn’t understand. Why? You are my best friend.” The next day she had a new boyfriend. Is that fair? The vampire girl disappears one day. She even sold the house next to his. So, after 8 years of living next door to that strange creature, he now often wonders what happened to her…  ~ Jolielaide  |
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1/21/2009 7:13 pm |
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1/21/2009 9:24 pm |
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and an almost one they are all gone now ~ Jolielaide
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a poorly summation of 8 long wonderful years but i have an excuse, i got the flu ~ Jolielaide
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i've first met him in 1995 when my father has died Jim was born on 1982 and a pisces that makes him about 13 our friendship finally ended in 2003 that time i've already met dimple LightHouses, and Gorgeous Dimples i saw him again in 2005 in rehab when he wrote this second version of the poem in my mind he remained a treasured friend ~ Jolielaide
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everyone who truly read my blogs would know ~ Jolielaide
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*btw gratitude to a certain bird from down under for letting me use his picture. go fatten up. you're so skinny ~ Jolielaide
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annie is to me what your classmate is to you. she's my boss for 13 years till i found another job but we remain best of friends. the woman is an angel. she accepted who i am completely, teeth and claws. she's a belgian and 11 years my senior. ~ Jolielaide
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but women friends are very different from men i still prefer the later my first bf when i was in elementary is also a boy-vincent i saw him again after 25 years when was that... 2002 i guess he still single and he told me i am his first love but of course i don't know about this because if i have to be force to name my first love it would be rolando i guess just read ~ Jolielaide
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sometimes there is a lot of thoughts that i cannot put into words jim is one of them i can write bits and pieces about the guy but everytime i try to bundle the years it everytime failed me there are few of those while others i can write a book in one setting ~ Jolielaide
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and Princess you really are a follower  ~ Jolielaide
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i remember when jim told me i was his first kiss for the love of God i can't remember how that happened so, i asked him for an explanation he said on his 16 birthday, his mother invited me to his party i came in late bearing a chocolate cake from goldilocks (brazo de mercedes) when i came in, i found him laying on a folding bed in their terrace he said i leaned over and give him a kiss saying happy birthday then after few minutes talking to his mother, i left is that classified as a first kiss???  ~ Jolielaide
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not for one second  ~ Jolielaide
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i thought so too sometimes i think jim is delusional ~ Jolielaide
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one time he deliberately broke the piggy bank of ate erna (his mother) so he could buy a set of french encyclopedias from the door -to-door salesman so he could converse in french with me  he always greeted me on the phone by saying "bon jour" weather it's morning midday or evening weird kid ~ Jolielaide
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1/22/2009 5:58 pm |
*btw gratitude to a certain bird from down under for letting me use his picture. go fatten up. you're so skinny
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i'll ask ~ Jolielaide
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i don't know Princess. i never saw him again since the last time. come to think of it, he's about 27 years old just for years younger than D. probably i will not recognize him anymore ~ Jolielaide
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did i mention that after i avoid seeing Jim because he changed, his youngest brother Jake took his place? i have no problem with the kid for he is gay. he's also a nurse. that is one exceptional person. i love him so very much and i'll keep missing him. ~ Jolielaide
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